Happy 5,000th!

  • Happy 5,000th!

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    Thread: Happy 5,000th!

    1. 01-28-2004, 11:04 AM #1
      Pancho1188
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      Default Happy 5,000th!

      visit-red-300x50PNG
      Happy 5,000 posts,

      Elana!

      Okay, for your 5,000th post, I\'ve introduced a new product that will be a best-seller!!!



      The Elana 5000

      or



      The Elana 5000

      If you\'re lazy,

      I\'ve copied and pasted the text below:


      The Elana 5000

      The Elana 5000 is the most revolutionary

      erotic accessory on the market today. The Elana 5000 has over 100 features and 32 settings for your sensual

      enjoyment. Set the Elana 5000 on \"Tease\" and choose from many varieties of flirting, playful physical contact,

      eye contact, hand-holding, massaging, dancing, lap dancing, and the world famous \"striptease\" setting specially

      patented by the makers of the Elana 5000. For a more sensual experience, set the Elana 5000 to \"Total sensual

      relaxation\", and she will set the mood with aromatherapy, essential oils, mood lighting, sensual music, and a

      full-body massage to send even the most tense person into utter relaxation and ecstasy. You\'ll never get tired

      of the Elana 5000 because of the multitude of features and settings that you will never be able to get

      through---even with life-long use!

      The Elana 5000 is great for any occasion. Simply wine and dine the Elana 5000

      for one of the most magical evenings of a lifetime. She can be taken to any event to boost your attractiveness and

      social status. She can make ex-girlfriends jealous, she can increase your success at business functions, and she

      can give you that fresh, commitment-oriented look to catch that special someone. She makes a great shopping,

      dancing, movie, and bar-hopping partner! We love the Elana 5000 so much, we can guarantee that she will work for

      you no matter what the situation may be!

      There is a word of caution when using the Elana 5000. The Elana 5000

      will only take care of you if you take care of it. The Elana requires a lot of love, caring, and support to allow

      for your full enjoyment. You must provide her the proper accommodations so she is able to look her best, be happy,

      and stay healthy. The Elana 5000 is not a slave. She will not cook, clean, etc. for you every day without proper

      reciprocation. Please take care of your Elana 5000 and she will take care of you.

      Editor\'s Note: The

      Elana 5000 has been discontinued because the manufacturer was only able to produce one. As the value of the Elana

      5000 is priceless, we have left it up to her to decide who receives such an amazing creation.

      The Elana

      5000...may or may not be in a store near you!!!




      Happy 5,000th, Elana!

      Love,

      Pancho

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
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    2. 01-28-2004, 11:27 AM #2
      Elana
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      Default Re: Happy 5,000th!



      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      Editor\'s Note: The Elana 5000 has been

      discontinued because the manufacturer was only able to produce one. As the value of the Elana 5000 is priceless, we

      have left it up to her to decide who receives such an amazing creation.

      <hr /></blockquote><font

      class=\"post\">

      That was sweet. Thanks, Pancho. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
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    3. 01-28-2004, 03:02 PM #3
      CptKipling
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      Default Re: Happy 5,000th!

      Yes a kiss ass, but

      what an ass to kiss [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
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    4. 01-28-2004, 05:23 PM #4
      Elana
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      Default Re: Happy 5,000th!

      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      Yes a kiss ass, but what an ass to kiss

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      A little

      spanking might be nice too. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]
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    5. 01-28-2004, 07:30 PM #5
      Ash
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      Default I can\'t take it any more.

      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      </font><blockquote><font

      class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      Editor\'s Note: The Elana 5000 has been discontinued because the

      manufacturer was only able to produce one. As the value of the Elana 5000 is priceless, we have left it up to her to

      decide who receives such an amazing creation.

      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">



      That was sweet.

      Thanks, Pancho. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      I can\'t

      take it any more. Stop encouraging him Elana.

      Puncho. What the hell is wrong with you? Did you get hit on the

      head when you were little; or soooomthing?

      Get some help kid! PLEASE!!!

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]
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    6. 01-28-2004, 11:45 PM #6
      Pancho1188
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      Default Re: I can\'t take it any more.

      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />

      That was sweet. Thanks, Pancho.

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      I can\'t take

      it any more. Stop encouraging him Elana.

      Puncho. What the hell is wrong with you? Did you get hit on the head

      when you were little; or soooomthing?

      Get some help kid! PLEASE!!!

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]

      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      Actually, I was

      dropped on my head as a kid, but I don\'t think that has anything to do with it...

      Seriously, if you don\'t

      like it, you don\'t have to read it. Period.
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    7. 01-29-2004, 03:45 AM #7
      EXIT63
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      Default Re: I can\'t take it any more.

      Now

      ladies, let\'s try to keep it civil. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

      Pancho, try to ignore

      Ash. He\'s just jealous of your ladykillerness. Who wouldn\'t be.

      Ash, Pancho has the right to post his

      platitudes. If reading his drivel upsets you. Then don\'t read it.

      Well, I handled that pretty well. I

      should be a moderator. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
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    8. 01-29-2004, 04:12 AM #8
      Elana
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      Default Re: I can\'t take it any more.

      Look at

      my sweet as sunshine Exit. His giant heart of gold only wants people to be happy and get along. So what that he

      called Mr. Rogers a homo. He meant it is the kindest, most loving way. The sky just opened up and flowers fell from

      the heavens because Exit walked into the room (in this case the thread). All hail Exit63!
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    9. 01-29-2004, 04:30 AM #9
      EXIT63
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      Default Re: I can\'t take it any more.



      BANG...ZOOM!!!
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    10. 01-29-2004, 08:52 AM #10
      CptKipling
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      Default Re: I can\'t take it any more.

      Pancho, we love you buddy! Keep the verbal diarrhoea flowing [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
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    11. 01-29-2004, 09:29 AM #11
      Pancho1188
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      PANCHO: See,

      this should be a post. This is the post.
      HOLMES: What?
      PANCHO: This. Just talking.
      HOLMES: (dismissing) Yeah,

      right.
      PANCHO: I\'m really serious. I think that\'s a good idea.
      HOLMES: Just talking? Well what\'s the

      post about?
      PANCHO: It\'s about nothing.
      HOLMES: No story?
      PANCHO: No forget the story.
      HOLMES: You\'ve

      got to have a story.
      PANCHO: Who says you gotta have a story? Remember when we were waiting for, for that table in

      that Chinese restaurant that time? That could be a forum post.
      HOLMES: And who is in the post? Who are the

      characters?
      PANCHO: I could be a character.
      HOLMES: You?
      PANCHO: Yeah. You could have a character like

      me.
      HOLMES: So, in the post, there\'s a character named Pancho Rivera?
      PANCHO: Yeah. There\'s something wrong

      with that? I\'m a character. People are always saying to me, \"You know you\'re a quite a

      character.\"
      HOLMES: And who else is in the post?
      PANCHO: Elana could be a character. Franki...
      HOLMES: Now

      he\'s a character. (Pause) So everybody I know is a character in the post.
      PANCHO: Right.
      HOLMES: And it\'s

      about nothing?
      PANCHO: Absolutely nothing.
      HOLMES: So you\'re saying, I go onto Love-Scent.com, and tell them I

      got this idea for a post about nothing.
      PANCHO: We go onto Love-Scent.com.
      HOLMES: \"We\"? Since when are you a

      writer?
      PANCHO: (Scoffs) Writer. We\'re talking about a forum.
      HOLMES: You want to go with me to

      Love-Scent.com?
      PANCHO: Yeah. I think we really got something here.
      HOLMES: What do we got?
      PANCHO: An

      idea.
      HOLMES: What idea?
      PANCHO: An idea for the post.
      HOLMES: I still don\'t know what the idea is.
      PANCHO:

      It\'s about nothing.
      HOLMES: Right.
      PANCHO: Everybody\'s doing something, we\'ll do nothing.
      HOLMES: So,

      we go onto Love-Scent.com, we tell them we\'ve got an idea for a post about nothing.
      PANCHO: Exactly.
      HOLMES:

      They say, \"What\'s your post about?\" I say, \"Nothing.\"
      PANCHO: There you go.
      (A moment passes)
      HOLMES:

      (Nodding) I think you may have something here.
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    12. 01-29-2004, 09:54 AM #12
      franki
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      Do you have nothing

      else to occupy your mind with?
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    13. 01-29-2004, 10:05 AM #13
      Pancho1188
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      Ouch.
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    14. 01-29-2004, 10:30 AM #14
      Ash
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      Do you have nothing else to occupy your mind with?



      <hr /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      Really Poncho. It\'s embarrassing to some of us. I feel like

      Sylvester the cats son after I read some of you posts. I just want to put a brown paper bag over my head.
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    15. 01-29-2004, 10:35 AM #15
      BigBear
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      Leave him

      alone!!!!!!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]

      -----BigBadBear [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]
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    16. 01-29-2004, 11:17 AM #16
      Gossamer_2701
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      Hey

      Pancho... I personally enjoy most of your posts, while occasionally wanting to pull that proverbial paper bag over

      my head to others [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] Keep it creative.... just let it flow man...



      All I want to know is.... How do you remember EVERY SINGLE line from those episodes?

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img] I mean I\'m a BIG fan of that show, and I know all those

      lines while reading your posts, but I couldn\'t sit down and just write them all out like that.
      Come on man..

      spill it... Google search... got the whole series on DVD... or should I start calling you \'Rain Man\'

      [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

      Anyway, keep on posting!!!!

      Goss
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    17. 01-29-2004, 11:44 AM #17
      Icarus
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      Pancho
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    18. 01-30-2004, 10:29 AM #18
      CptKipling
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      Default Re: Post about Nothing

      </font><blockquote><font class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      </font><blockquote><font

      class=\"small\">Quote:</font><hr />
      Do you have nothing else to occupy your mind with?

      <hr

      /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      Really Poncho. It\'s embarrassing to some of us. I feel like

      Sylvester the cats son after I read some of you posts. I just want to put a brown paper bag over my head.

      <hr

      /></blockquote><font class=\"post\">

      To use (or brutally plagiarise, you deside) one of Panchos old

      sigs\':

      The line |
      You -----|---&gt; [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]

      Not

      cool
      Reply With Quote Reply With Quote
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